Thanks so much (((((((roxiesmom)))))) and ((((((Fearfulfrog)))))) for understanding how I feel!! And thanks so much to (((((((PT))))))) and (((((((((VJ)))))))) for your support!! And thank you to everyone else just for being here and for letting me be a part of it!!

((((larakazieh)))) I'm really sorry you're feeling so bad. I hope you find relief and I'm wishing you all good things!

Sending the same good wishes to (((((((Lilleth)))))))

(((((((PT)))))))) It's great you've got motivated to send out more job apps. I'm keeping everything crossed for you!

Good to hear your mood is holding up well! (((((((((thinker))))))))) Good luck with your assignments!

(((((((((((fearfulfrog))))))))))))) I'm sorry things are so incredibly stressful with the court case. That just sucks. But it is amazing to hear how well you are coping with everything. Wow! Go you!!! I'm really glad your meds are working and that you're holding up so well. That's great. Happy Anniversary too!

I hope your sleep pattern gets back to normal now you're on a new work schedule ((((((((Innerzone)))))))) Sleep (or bad quality/lack of sleep) really screws things up!

((((((((((((vj))))))))))))) I'm really sorry you're stressing about the job situation. I hope very much that your husband finds something soon and that you don't have to go back to a job you left because it was so stressful. I think it's really important to get back to a point of feeling stable again before taking on any more challenges. I wish you peaceful times and good news on the job front for your husband!

I've had a crap day so far. Well, it actually started off ok and I was able to get some sleep last night. But then mid-way through the morning I started feeling sick and just really queasy and not well. Then I started panicking about the way I was feeling. So I had to go back to pacing again to try and calm down. Sort of calmed down, but continued feeling really unwell. Weak and shaky and nauseous. I hate this so much. I just do not know what is wrong with me.

I have put in a call to my doctor. Trouble is my doctor attributes EVERYTHING to anxiety now so I'm going to have to be insistent, which I'm not looking forward to. Plus, to be fair to her, she has done some extensive blood tests and one or two other things. BUT I still feel really unwell a lot of the time and that can't be right!!!! Plus it fuels my anxiety, and vice versa.

Ugh. Sorry. I'm just repeating myself. I know I've said all this before. I just really need to figure out what is going on. I've put a call into my pdoc too. The thing I already know what he will say. He will tell me to start taking the Klonopin every day, twice a day, come rain or shine. And I'm so very reluctant to go that route.

I did have a good therapy session yesterday and I guess I will write about that another time since this is already really long. The trouble is I don't get to see her very often and so the sessions feel like a band-aid. I felt better when I left, but the "wound" re-opens again soon afterwards!!

Sorry to go on. Thanks for just letting me have this place to get some of this stuff out!!!

Hugs to all!!!