Where are you, Flemingnett? What kind of culture do you live in? What kind of culture were you raised in? Same questions regarding your wife?

You have an absolute right to unimpeded communication, in person and by telephone or otherwise, with your family and any member of it. Your wife simply has nothing to say about that. If she tries to impose any punishment of any kind on you for being with your family, you must seriously consider whether this is a woman with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. If she can't be corrected, you must think about alternatives. Your choice is to put up with her horsehockey (euphemism) or leave her. Regardless of whether you have children, this is a choice you have to consider seriously. There is no "magic answer" to your question. The magic question is whether or not you're going to put up with this nonsense for the rest of your life. Take care and good luck!