I just saw this thread.

I hope that you are feeling more safe right now. I just want to share with you that there is hope. i was in a similar boat as you in the last several years. I was getting more and more depressed, agitated, confused, etc. I finally went seeking help and was so discouraged when I kept getting worse. In the last 14 months, I was hospitalized 4 times. I was told that there were probably no meds that would help me and that I was just going to have to live with it. Finally, my p-nurse found a combo that made me feel a little better with few side effects. (right now I am only dealing with weight gain and a little morning drowsiness) We tweaked doses and I can honestly say that I feel balanced for the first time in years. I am even thinking about going back to school.

There is hope.