Phoenix, thank you so much for sharing what you've been feeling. We feel like we got marked. Like those first people that hurt us when we were young put a mark on us, and evil people everywhere have always been able to see it. Like a target. They can see that it's okay to hurt us.
We will never know what it looks like. We will never be able to see what it is about us that makes us a target for pain and hurt, because we are not evil. We, and you, don't have to forgive those that hurt you. You only have to forgive yourself. It's really difficult. We're still working on it. Forgive ourselves for letting us get hurt, for having whatever it is that predators see, for not fighting, for not telling, for telling the wrong person, for all our mistakes. To h3ll with forgiving them, but work on forgiving yourself.