Who dislikes hugs? But seriously, regarding your need to change, what can those of us out here, with our kaleidoscope of different ages, different problems, different intelligence levels, different verbal levels, do for you to help you in what you want to do? That's a big, big question. At the moment all I can respond is with small, small ideas. In what sense are you a "stupid spoiled brat"? Details, please. What are the details about your feeling you have no purpose? How could that possibly be true considering your wildly impressive record here on PC? What purpose is better than helping people? Which you've done over and over and over again here? And, of course, you're neither too stupid nor too useless to do anything you want, including climbing out of your hole. Yes, of course, I live in that hole too for much of the time. Do you actually have a T? It really sounds like not. And you should, you know, and I know you do know. Here we are, Fuzzybear, in our tens of thousands, awaiting your word on the kind of support you'd like, support that will truly help you to get out of the hole, now, this time, and forever. Are you really saying that all of your years on PC haven't produced even some effect? That you don't find helping others to be a decent way of getting out of one's own hole? There are so many questions, for which I apologize; but they're necessary in light of (1) your skeletal post; (2) your history on PC; and (3) your obvious familiarty with the kinds of problems presented here and the ways of dealing with them. I'm quite serious, and would most appreciate a response from you as serious as this post. Take care!