Zopiclone worked well for me.
I'm sorry you're going thro such a hard time.
Please speak to your pdoc. Being booked off cannot be such a bad thing - if you are feeling the way you are, you are probably not being very productive at work anyway - they'll carry on fine without you - you need to be safe and look after your well-being.
I felt like you are a few days ago. And the stresses of work can be triggering and just make things worse.

Do you see a T to discuss these emotions with? When you're going through them, please journal about it.
Thinking of you - I'm just a PM away!