My emotions, omg, where do I start? I'm usually in pretty good control of them but lately it's not the case. I'm falling apart at work, my gf has threatened to leave me and says I'm using up her reserves lately, which in some ways I can understand I guess it can be a little overwhelming at times to be a part of my drama but for the most part I thought I did a pretty good job of keeping things to myself and as most people would say "pulling myself up from my bootstraps" and dealing with it. I'm exhausted and mentally bruised lately with med changes and not feeling a lot of support from the person I'm supposed to be able to lean on. Ok, so maybe I do a little too much leaning? I really didn't think so but I guess from the fights we've had lately, I have. I'm not sure why someone would want to fight with someone that clearly isn't able to defend themselves, but I've been told lately that I'm weak and fragile. I will tell you, (or myself) that that is the furthest from the truth. I have been through hell and back over these few years and I won't let anyone tell me that I'm weak..I have found within myself the strength to take some of my anger and use it to help me push forward even after my med fiasco this last weekend. I won't go into that one just yet but I will say that coming off of lamictal is wayyyyy harder than getting on it. It has been a nightmare. In the meantime my emotions are all over the place and I could really use some support, which is why I keep coming back here..

I love you all for all your support
K