Yes, I get so disgusted with this disease and with myself for constantly trying to do something about it that I get tired. No body cares because no body can change it. I am on meds, thank God, but it still seeps through to my conciousness like water in the basement walls. I find myself obsessivey thinking about stuff that just don't make a hill of beans. It does not matter what I tell myself, it don't go away until maybe if I go to sleep or take a nap. That is why I love to sleep so much. It is the only time I am not depressed (or at least it seems that way). Just posting this is making me sad and lonely. I try to do good for myself, but I usually get it wrong.