Bridgie,

Yes you are right I have learned that things wouldn't be as bad if I had told Nicole the truth from the beginning. Even though I was trying not to hurt her feelings by avoiding telling her things that happened that I knew would hurt her but I should have just told her what happened even though I knew how hurt and angry she would be. She did tell me she needed to know EVERYTHING and I know I should have told her everything that happened because I knew especially the way rumors got around about my ex Sara that she was going to find things out, I just was hoping the situation where Sara claimed she was pregnant (Sara always thought it was funny just to say it even if it was BS). I think Sara did this just to upset Nicole because that's the kind of person Sara is.

I have apoligized multiple times to Nicole and the problem is just that I went out with Sara twice and Nicole keeps thinking thats going to happen again. Nicole does not want to hang out with me at my house because I had sex with Sara in my bedroom which was the same room where Nicole and I shared our first kiss together when we were going out for a short time after I broke up with Sara the first time in 2005. Nicole refuses to come over here and this is why I think she has PTSD. I need to know what I should do, because I think she is going to need professional help and counseling because she is continually angry and we end up re-hashing everything that happend she keeps thinking that I want to go out with other women, this is completley un-true I always wanted to be with Nicole, I wish things would of worked out with Nicole because she is the person I wanted to be with and do want to be with. She tells me she frequently has panic attacks she tells me during the day.

The reason why she has an issue with me going places is because she flashes back to when I went to a hockey game with Sara (the only game I went with Sara to) back in 2004. Every time I have gone to see a game she has gotten so upset. She tells me that when she doesn't get to talk to me particularly on the weekend at night when we are able to talk for hours on end, when she doesn't get to talk on weekend evenings which is typically when I go to games, she starts thinking that were back in that situation again where I'm going out with Sara. She keeps relapsing and flashing back into the past she tells me and she keeps thinking that I am going out with Sara all over again. She dosent want to come over to my house for the same reason, especially if she was here she would have to confront her memories again and she told me she would get very angry and upset because if she did come over she would know that Sara was at my house and we had sex and things. Just knowing that Sara was here freaks her out. What can I do about this? Should I talk to her mother and tell her maybe that Nicole needs therapy? Because when I bring this up to her she just refuses to acknowledge that she needs help and I think she really does. The only time she would consider hanging out is when I move into a different house.