Thanks Miss Laura. Thanks Suzzie. Thanks Melissa. Thanks Notz

I took a nap and am feeling a little better. It usually helps me calm down. So the urges aren't so strong right now. I'm feeling safer. I hate that one little thing can send me spiraling. This will probably sound really stupid.

I sent my dad a link to something that I thought was really important and angering. But he said he only spent one minute looking at it and didn't think it was important at all. It isn't like I send him something all the time. I hardly ever send him something. It made me feel so unimportant. Like I was invisible. Shouldn't something I consider important at least garner a response of, I see this is important to you. Not, I think this is stupid.

I guess I shouldn't believe that he can change. That he will ever think anything that is important to me is important to him.

I never should have expected what mattered to me to be important. It never was in the past. I don't know why I thought it should matter now.