I have a low threshold for everything, so this will probably sound whiny and I'm sorry about that.

I made a list of the stuff I need to get done before the end of the semester, and I have no idea where I'm going to find the energy to do all of it. I don't have any momentum right now. It takes me forever to get started and then I can't concentrate and besides, half of my projects require me to deal with other people. All I want to do is hide in a hole and you expect me to do a group project? Or stand in front of forty people and talk for fifteen minutes? Sometimes I think they wouldn't have let me into this school if they had known how much of a socially-awkward silent introvert I am.

I know I'm smart enough to do this, or at least I hope I'm smart enough to do this. But I wish it didn't look so impossible from here. And it's just second nature for everyone else...so what's my problem?

I feel like I'm just biding my time until my first counseling appointment next week. I know it won't get better right away, though. Last year it got worse for a while and I didn't know how to communicate that and I thought it might never stop getting worse. I don't think I even care whether that happens again. Just as long as I can stop feeling invisible.

Okay. I'm done. *very sad song played on the world's smallest violin*