First of all, big big to everyone. Wanting to respond to so much more than I'm quite able to at this time... am thinking of all of you though, be assured of that. (Sorry. To be honest, I'm just kind of wrapped up in my head over my own troubles right now...)

So, today, not too bad. Got to work super early (to be absolutely sure not to have a repeat meltdown...). Went well despite having to work with someone I really dislike *and* having to deal with the most challenging configuration yet -- which went quite well(!!!) Overall, still a lot of anxiety, but considering the circumstances, to be expected. Still worried that the strain might set off an episode, but holding steady. Yea! Very fitful sleep last night...wake/snooze/wake/snooze etc all night. Bleh. Just now agreed to take one graveyard shift. _One_. So... no sleep again tonight for sure. Probably not a great idea, but I need to stockpile brownie points (and hours...) against next week's unavailability on 3 days (psych appt. (perfect timing), and going to court two days in a row over 2 different things. Witness one day, emotional support for my still very shaken up and unwaveringly beloved BF the next. Yeah, anxiety much?! )

The rest is unpleasant, but do-able. The second court thing? EXTREME stress. Still haven't decided if I'm even able to, or even *if* to post about what happened, though it is eating me alive and the most trying thing since being on the forums. Can't even really process it yet. So many unknowns. And they're big.

Holding steady though. Holding steady. TG for my meds.