dear dogwood,
oh my dear, i am so sorry things are going so badly for you and your husband. please don't think i am being nosey, because this is just some thoughts based on my own experiences. i am bipolar too and after a long life of suffering, at age 49 was able to get on disability (SSDI). however, since you haven't worked i don't know how that would be of help, or maybe try medicaid?

i know about being poor, i wear it well, and am now 63. and lost dreams are sadly remembered as i look back on this life of disappointments. but there IS hope my dear. it is my own experience that things are always their darkest before the dawn breaks. i posted a poem in this forum called "Searching for My Higher Power". maybe it might help you to look for a source of hope and answers for these hard questions you are posing now about where to turn next.

also, this is a poem posted by another member here (SophieG if i remember correctly). i hope it may offer you some hope. take care, you are a loved child of "god" and a cherished human being.

[begin quote]

Don't quit when the tide is lowest,
For it's just about to turn;
Don't quit over doubts and questions,
For there's something you may learn
Don't quit when the night is darkest
For it's just a while 'til dawn;
Don't quit when you've run the farthest
For the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is amost nigh;
Don't quit, for you're not a failure
Unilt you fail to try.
-Jill Wolf

[end quote]

sending you and your husband much love and prayers of hope (2 Corin. 4:8-10)

p.s.
i was born in maryville, tn, small world!