Hi Primer,

Even though it feels confusing, it is really normal to have questions about your sexuality, especially around this time in high school. That being said, I really think you should find a therapist because you mentioned that there have been times you have felt suicidal. I know it is easy to brush of and say "well, I'm feeling OK now." But it points to something just not being right. You obviously have some anger / hurt /sadness that is down deep... Thing is to figure out why. This is what therapists are for. You deserve to feel better (not have this kind of emotional pain). Even if you can handle it sometimes it is good to have someone to turn to to help you handle it if things do get bad and you feel worse. It is helpful to have a safe place to work on these questions.