googley -- my friends are busy tonight. I don't want to hang out in a big group so I get to be alone tonight. No one would be able to change the way I feel anyway. My brother said I could come over but he only makes me feel worse when I am depressed, because he wants to have intellectual discussions all the time and I just don't have the energy for that when I feel this way. So it's probably better that I'm alone. I'll just find a movie to watch on Netflix or something.

cmac, I had to end therapy because my T is moving so she can take care of her dad who is very sick with Alzheimer's. She has to move to another state. Our therapy ended at a really bad time for me actually, so it's taking a lot to be strong right now. I'm doing my best.

Thanks for the support guys.. just trying to get through the night. I think being alone at night with this will be the hardest part.