Jexa, I'm glad you are here too. I know it'd be hard to be around a group of people who don't know or understand what you're going through tonight. You are definitely in the right place for that here on PC.

I just wrote an email to my T (but didn't send it). I am triggered by this more than I expected to be. It hits so close to home and just makes me see how deep my abandonment stuff goes. I don't know if it'll ever get better. I want to quit T on my terms and not go through what you are, being forced to quit seeing a T that you bonded with and that was helping you.

Anyway, this isn't about ME, sorry for getting off track . We are here with you, Jexa.