Well to me it sounds like you two are in a situation where you are having to parent a child except I'm not hearing that any parenting is going on. Since she is in your home she must comply with house rules. Those house rules need to be discussed and agreed upon by all of you. Your bf sounds like a nice person that is trying to help out his family and doesn't know what to do in this situation. The rules need to be written down and she needs to know that in order to live here she must comply. If this is somethig that you can't be involved with then you do need to say so and be prepared to make other arrangements. The girl is a child and doesn't understand how hard this is for you but I know that doesn't help your situation. If you think that you can handle it if rules are set then you need to know for how long? What has happened with the Dad? Where is the Mom? Can you two be expected to provide a home for this child? For how long? This can't be a good situation for this child. She needs to be in a situation where she is welcome and can be nurtured. This isn't something you can give her and that is not your fault! It is the truth, at this point in your life you can not take care of a child and give her what she needs. Let your bf read these posts so he can what others are posting about this issue. I hope this all gets better for all of you!