I totally understand, by the way. I am avoidant. I had to tell someone I met online that they cannot come to visit. I said I am just not good at having house guests. And it would not work out well. They did not take it well. But we are more close than we ever were. I come with limitations. Could you explain some of it to them? Or would that reveal tmi?? Most importantly, there is time. it is a year away. Please try not to worry too much now.