When I reach out for his hand, my cry for help, I say "Dad I want to talk to a counselor, a therapist.. anyone.. please help me find someone?"

He'll pull away, and respond with something like: "They're not going to help you, the only one who can help you is yourself.." Crushing me, putting all responsibility on me, before abandoning the topic.

So he leaves me there, sitting in my own misery, my progress shunned, my problems ignored. Simple things, people, they are easily dealt with, and he can help me.. but complex things, his own daughter, well.. he'll put on this mentality that if he doesn't acknowledge it, it's not there..

I can't move forward with him blocking my way, I need him there, beside me.