Thanks guys - we had a bit of a chat last night and this morning, me telling him a bit of what i expect out of our relationship. I need to put my foot down, and the next time he gets physical, I need to assure myself - it's the last. You just never know how far it can carry on going... and I told him he scares me now.
I think a lot of his actions are due to issues he hasn't dealt with, but who am I to tell him what to do - and he's not the kind to go seek out therapy either. And it seems alcohol plays a big role in his physical actions towards me too.