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Mommas, I'm so so SO sorry for your loss, and wish that I had the words to console you in the way that you need. Have you tried grief counseling? After the loss of my mom when I was 19, I went to counseling with my brother, and it helped us immensely.
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A good friend once told me: All the things that you are doing for others DO NOT GO IN VAIN, and it may seem that you are not getting a return, but you are, maybe not now, but God never lets any good deed go unrewarded.
"How can I feel abandoned, even when the world surrounds me;
How can I bite the hand that feeds the strangers all around me;
How can I know so many; never really knowing anyone;
If I seem superhuman I have been Misunderstood."
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