Hi Bridger.

It sounds like you already know the answer to your own question. You could live in fort knox and she will probably be still afraid. Fear that stem from abuse is not rational, you cannot say to yourself that the door is locked, so no one can get it... you cannot reason with or subdue these fears with reasoning or rational behaviour, like upgrading the security. The core issue of abuse, where the fear comes from, must be adressed. This is not as easy as asking about the weather, and it takes a lot of time, patience and love. Therapy is a very good idea, if it is at all possible, but on the other hand, if she chooses not to participate then everything you do is in vain. You have to convince her that she is still harbouring these bad things somewhere inside of her and it is just going to keep coming out in unhealthy ways if she doesn't deal with the issue directly.