Salukigirl, that sounds really hard. Have you ever talked with him about the way you perceive his comments? Could things change without a discussion? I don't know. Maybe there is a way to respond to his comments that would nip them in the bud?

What you wrote reminded me exactly of what Jennifer James (psychologist--not sure) used to lecture and speak about extensively. She called those daily criticisms we receive "slugs" and said women are especially prone to getting into family situations where their husbands and children and parents dish out these slugs to them continuously and it wears them down, they get depressed, feel resentful, etc. So she wrote and spoke about how women can deal with these slugs that their "loved ones" give to them. I searched for her online and found her website. Her name is Jennifer James and she has a book called, "Defending Yourself Against Criticism: the Slug Manual." This is the link for the book:
http://www.jenniferjames.com/products/book.htm

I don't know how she recommends dealing with these "slugs", but it might be useful for me to learn this too, as there are certain people in my life who dish out slugs to me whenever I am with them. It wears on me and prevents us from being closer.

Good luck.