There is no need to be afraid to seek help...every person here has sought help just by coming to the site. And now you are reaching out. That is a good first step. The second step is to reach out in RL. Talk to your family. They may sense something is wrong, but if you're hiding it well, they could be waiting for you to explain. There are hotlines to call like 1.800.273.TALK if you need to hear a soothing voice, but aren't quite ready to talk to your family.Don't suffer another day alone, IWTBN.