I'm sorry that "gaslighting" sounds familiar to you in your experiences.
I can relate too.

that is a huge trigger of mine-- someone trying to spin what happened into a different view.... the anxiety rises to such high levels... ugh....

I hope you have someone to talk to that you can trust-- that's what i found to be so so important. (a therapist, clergy person, partner, friend) I've finally got the courage to go to authorities, or those incharge, and have been surprised at how I've been listened to. I hope that you find that as well-- it's so important.
Like it's been said-- the truth will set you free.
I'm finding more and more peace by speaking my truths-- out loud-- and not letting those who's drive it is to abuse get away with it.

You can always write here and if you need to you can PM as well.

don't ever stop believing in yourself

fins