I ****ing KNEWW this was going to happen. I ****ING KNEW IT. But i didnt care. I just wanted some friends.I just didnt want to be alone anymore. I ****ing knew they were using me. I didnt even care. I guess I deserve it then. Uhhg. Why do I ALWAYS!! do this to myself. I feel like ****.I knew I would end up crying and they wouldnt be close friends anyway, WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why do I always do this to myself. Why do I always have to be the subject of humiliation. I was finally feeling better. The depression went away, but now I can't even deal with the pain. I ****ing knew all I needed was a simple trigger to **** me up again but this time im totally alone.