Every Day I want to die but, I live. I live because something in the "universe" ... something of "fate" wants me to still be here...I have purpose...so I get up and smile each day, knowing that my suffering will not end on this earth but, might manifest itself in beauty...later on... since good and bad are a paradox...compassion cannot exist without pain and vice versa ...I'd like to die because I hate it here on this earth, I hate to witness, to feel all the suffering...but, God put me here and that is enough...for me to stay. I am a miracle. I fell off the bandistar head first when I was young and could have died but, I am still here. I am still here. strong and ready to live.