((((((((((ickydog)))))))))))) I am so sorry you are having such a rough time right now. I am glad you have a friend that understands what you are going through right now. Use that understanding to help you through this tough time. Try and live minute by minute if you need to. If you can, try and stay on your meds as this may help you from the feeling of having to cut. Use the strength you have and don't give up on other things that will distract you when the urge feels so strong. Good luck I am thinking of youl.