Well, I just talked to my mother for the first time in quite a few days. I called and my dad answers the phone. He talks very hateful to me, and I don't even know why. I'm never there to make anyone mad about anything, and there's really no reason for him to be mean to me like that. My sister is there with them every single day. She doesn't live with them, but she lives right down the road. She does anything and everything they ask her to do. Thus, she is the almighty princess. She honestly does nothing wrong in their eyes. And I mean NOTHING. I, on the other hand, am way less than what they expect me to be. I live about an hour and a half drive away from them, and I don't see them much. Really I didn't see them much when I only lived 30 minutes away from them. I just don't understand what it is about me that is so unlovable to them. What is friggen wrong with me?!?! Why am I "the one" that isn't deserving enough to be treated like a human? My mother is an alcoholic, and she has made me feel like crap for years. But as an adult I've tried to help them in any way I can.. even though they still treat me like garbage. Why do I continue to try to help them when all they do is bring me down? Am I just an idiot? I don't talk to them that much. But if they need something that they think I can help them with... they'll call me. And stupid me will always give in and help with whatever it may be. BUT I can just call to say hi and I get talked to like I am nothing. Geez...sometimes my life seems so hopeless. I just wish I could stop feeling like I owe them something... kinda like I have to do nice things for them so I'll be accepted by them. But I just don't know why I feel like I HAVE to be accepted by people that treat me like *****... and always have! God, I am an idiot.