oh lolly i encourage you to keep trying. your life will be so beautiful if you do. 
most places have an incredible number of meetings to accomodate everyone's schedules. may i ask why you're having a time of it getting to one? they can really help us get thru the process of stopping and many other benefits too about living life.
i'm glad you posted. you can do this and i know in your heart you want to.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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