TY Lynn - my mom doesn't know how I feel. I don't think she could handle it. It would drive her crazy (not that she isn't already) or it would drive me crazy because her memory is drastically different than mine and she would deny everything which would only cause me more pain. I did speak up to her once before my wedding and she didn't talk to me for a year - everything I said she denied even when I had witnesses to her behaviors. As recently as a few months back she told my husband that as a child I was very easy and never needed to be spanked/punished etc.. (of course the beatings for no reason seemed to slip her mind in addition to other forms of abuse). My T and I discussed this and the theory is she needs to tell herself this to create her own reality for some mental peace of sorts or self protection if you will.

I don't want my to try to involve my mom at all. I can only see that making things worse. At least now I can 'visit' with her.