Exactly, suzzie. That is something that seems to be individual thing.

I have been able to accept a couple of abusive memories ~ 15 years or so after the events. Several other memories have dragged me down for 35 years. Those older ones gnaw on my fragile inner core. While I know that I must accept the past, to go on more healthily in the future, I fight against acceptance.

Not an easy road...not a quick road...but I am aware of my contribution to my misery by not accepting these memories.