"Well, I've been in a romantic relationship. (We didn't have sex though.) It hurt too much. I could feel myself becoming a different person, and not necessarily in a good way. There was little control in one's emotions when one's in love, like a force much stronger than me was controlling me. Everything was too intense. That's why I don't want the strain of romanticism in my relationship, and instead want a friend with benefit. Or if it's to be romantic, I want it slow and not so intense, so that I don't lose control of myself. I don't want to get so hurt again."

Hi. I've read and re-read your comments. I think that this is not just true of you - it's true of everyone. Love is a very strong emotion. The trick is to keep your emotions in check a little to make sure that you are falling in love with a person with whom you have things in common, e.g., similar values, and who is being honest and is compatible with you. Learning these things take time. So, it's always a good idea to go slow. Love is a very enjoyable emotion, why does it seem to raise feelings of hurt so much? Maybe you're not becoming a different person but are growing / developing as a person? Friends with benefits are nice but without love you would be missing out on a lot, don't you think?