So I went to my first appointment at my school's counseling center today, and I have to say that spilling my guts to a stranger is possibly the most nervewracking thing I've ever done. They have you fill out this checklist of possible problems in the waiting room, which is fine, but then you have to talk about your problems. And yes, I know that's the point, and it worked exactly the same way as it did when I went there before. But there was a part of me hoping that maybe she'd look at the things I checked off, say, "Hmm, yes, I know what's going on here," and spend the rest of the time talking about, like, puppies or something. No such luck, but it was okay. The counselor was very very nice, I liked her a lot, and she seemed like she was really listening to what I had to say. That being said, it was painful. I thought I was going to cry the whole time I was there, but I managed to not freeze up like I thought I was going to. I have no idea how.

I have another appointment next week and she talked about having me make an appointment with the psychiatrist there. I'm starting to feel like a problem child. I know it's good that I'm dealing with my problems, but I wish it weren't such an ongoing process.

Here is what I want to do right now: and then for several days. Or better yet: But I probably have too much homework for that.