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Old Nov 04, 2010, 05:09 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
Upwards and Onwards!
 
Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: Kent, UK
Posts: 7,878
I've told him to stick it, until
a. I get paid for my time
b. I have recovered and have some energy back.
The problem is that none of them are vaguely technologically minded, I put together a spreadsheet to help them, yet they still need me to capture and balance things.

But I need to look after myself - as much as I love him. I will just feel guilty if something goes wrong due to me not being able to help.

I'm really going crazy in my own skin right now. I feel emotional and know I can burst into tears at any moment. I am physically and mentally exhausted. I cannot hope to be productive at work. My chest is getting tight and at the same time I feel like i just want to scream.
I battle with abandonment issues. Yet I just want to run away and be left alone - to my thoughts, my emotions, my crazy brain. But then I also just want to be comforted and held...!?!? Don't know where to start, but sitting in an office is NOT ideal. But it is my routine and what I know
__________________
"I'd rather attempt to do something great and fail than to attempt to do nothing and succeed. Robert H. Schuller"

Current dx: Bipolar Disorder Unspecified

Current Meds: Epitec (Lamotrigine) 300mg, Solian 50mg, Seroquel 25mg PRN, Metformin 500mg, Klonopin prn