Glad you are feeling better, thebosswoman! It's weird. I remember how hellish it is being down, but it's mentally --remembering in my head, but not viscerally. Which is a good thing(!) But. What I remember most is being waaaay down, so it's often hard to recognize lesser degrees, even if they're pretty serious.

I totally isolate. It is very good that you do reach out, so be sure to give yourself credit for that! On the mother thing... to my thinking, the biggest disappointments arise from the expectation part of things. To many, this is the hope/expectation of support from family. But sometimes it is simply not forthcoming. I let go of any expectations of ever having positive interactions with my mother, so this is not an issue for me. Maybe it is wrong (and I avoid speaking to her like the plague, maybe once a year, but that is kind of something else...and no, she doesn't know about the BP), but I realized I had to do it. Of course, my solution is rather extreme, but the point is more about expectations. Support is where you find it, not necessarily where you expect it. Kind of like that saying about friends being the family you choose. Also, maybe there is someone else in your family who would be supportive(?)

Get it off your chest all you like! That's what we're here for!