Thanks for the support and advice. Yes, I have my own distractions...many...and I use them as often as possible. Thank you for the ideas too. I want to schedule appointments closer together but, at the same time, it would be nice if I didn't because I try to keep a distance because I know at some point I will have to quit therapy and I don't want to get to close to any person...I do journal. all the time. see...i have already and most of the time, follow these ideas and suggestions... i understand many of the concepts behind, T's have lives too and we have to be mindful of that...but, sometimes when you are a person in pain..and it overwhelms...concepts and rules fail...they really don't mean as much when someone is in pain...I understand them, yes...I do my best to abide by them but, concepts bite the dust when your chest hurts and your tears fall...i hate that it is this way but, it is this way for me. thank you. for the comments. greatly appreciated.