All the things about T that help me feel healed have nothing to do with his personal history: his quiet voice, his stillness when I talk, his ability to feel angry or sad for me, his patience and caring and constant compassion. There are plenty of people, I suspect, who have been through what I have who *couldn't* help me as he has. In some ways I think it's good that he is from a different world, so to speak, because I know he is working hard all the time to try to get where I am coming from and what life is like for me.