Hi Pat, and thank you for the welcome. Yes I'm seeing a therapist, that I went to over 5 yrs ago. I'm also on anti-depressives since almost 2 months now, and they have helped me to get some energy back. But I'm not sure when I lost hope, that things won't get better. because for some reason I don't trust myself! I've done so many stupid things without being aware of what I'm doing until it's too late. I know there's no easy way out. It takes some hard work to get rid of old fears and habitual bad stinking thinking ((((