Just when you think you're comfortable *wham!* Ahhhh.....I haven't been so relieved to walk into my apartment as I was tonight. Long story short, I went to a sober party tonight, about 50 sober people at a house, having a great time. Within about 5 minutes, all those insecurities and old behaviors hit hard, out of nowhere, with little warning. Or shall I say inner warnings I did not heed. What I learned tonight is to trust my gut, listen to myself and not do something when I don't feel 100% about it. What I did right was listening to myself even if it was a little late, getting out of an uncomfortable situation without a backward glance, and picking up the phone. I learned that if I don't trust my gut, then I don't trust my higher power, and it put me too close to the edge. I didn't crave a drink, but I lost my serenity there for a bit, and it sucked, and I don't want that to happen again. Yuck yuck yuck but a learning experience and hope to share. A crappy yet successful night.