I have to get this off of my chest.

I am 44 years old. I still fricking deliver pizzas on the weekend. I have a fulltime job that is going nowhere in a hurry.

I do have something good though, my wife and kids. Yet no one gives a crap about the fact that we are going to freeze this winter because we can't afford to pay our 500.00 gas bill.

I started playing drums when I was 12. Retired at 20. Started again at age 42 and this Saturday is the biggest day of my music career when I open for a Grammy Award winning artist. I even told my work, and invited everyone. No one responded. No one cares.

I have a piece of **** car that is literally on it's last legs. I have to drive 45 miles one way to work. 90 miles a day, plus the weekend delivery crap, and when that car dies I wont be able to get another, because I am currently in a Chapter 13 bankruptcy and no one will finance with an active BK going on. And when the car dies, I can't work. The banks and the lawyer and the judge dont care.

As it is money is so tight right that I will probably feed my family toast for supper tonight.

Nobody cares.

I know. It's my fault, I made the mistakes. Yet everyone has to suffer because of me.

And when something good comes along that could lift me up and my family, nobody cares.

I am tired of trying. I am tired of worrying. I am tired of fighting. And if nobody else cares, then i am tired of caring too.