Quote:
Originally Posted by purple_fins
I was on a different site about 6 months ago, they were posting about some little girl(11 years old, I think she was) and how she had been kidnapped and the guy told her
to stay in his closet while he went to work or he'd kill her..... so she did. Well, some people on that forum were saying how she was stupid and that if she got killed then it's not as big of a deal because she didn't fight back, she was too stupid.......(are they right? was she? Im not sure, feels that she wasn't being stupid-- but do I just not see that?)
and now with Elizabeth Smart back in the news and how she even evaded the police with her kidnapper as he told her he would kill her if she escaped, I worry that some people will think she was stupid too....
this is bringing my experience to the surface.... uck....  being held at gunpoint for hours, (I was 8) and pleading with him to let my little niece go-- she was three at the time... he did let her go... so then it was just me and my nephew (he was 6).... I did whatever he said to do as he said I would die..... (odd-- even now talking about it, my heart is racing... after all these years)
it was an open field with trees and tall weeds...
why didn't I run?...
was it self preservation?...
do other people that haven't experienced such a thing, understand the thoughts of those in the midst of it all?
I wonder....
or was I stupid?? 
a confused fins....... |
((((purple fins)))) THAT WAS SELF PRESERVATION!! Its part of human nature! Thank God for that! You are very brave. I cannot imagine being in such an experience... Each 1 of us facing danger - especially as a child - and encountering such violence goes into survival mode with the Fight/Flight/Freeze response. You innately/instinctivly went into Freeze mode = cooperating and considering the safety of younger family members also at gunpoint
You at 8 were also versus an unstable person pointing a gun at children - if you had freaked him out in any way by running or fighting, the gun could have gone off... I am sorry that you are struggling with self-doubt & fear again now with these recent situations and memories
Violence toward children in any way by family, friends, neighbours, strangers, peers etc is WRONG!
You are very caring and brave to be able to do all that you did
You are not alone...