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I'm embarrassed that I sent this to T. but, thanksgiving is coming up and i always get really emotional right before it.
Short Poem: Invisible Dinners
I spoke to my youth pastor at church. She looked me in the eye and noticed how something unexplainable stole my worth. It was nothing strangers could see, only another memory of my cousin coming on to me...I cried on the bathroom floor...at church... trembling in the stall, beyond closed doors...I guess that's how its always been for me...I have a habit of hiding behind closed doors but, I guess that's my own choice. Ever since I can remember my cousin fell in love with me and I don't know what I did to spark his interest, cuz before I even understood what love was he was interested... particularly at Thanksgiving dinner. I will never forget it. Nothing absolutely terrible happened...I know this... except the feeling of being trapped, helpless, except the feeling of being 'degraded'&'betrayed'--since family is suppose to protect not intimidate... except the feeling of being caged in; the feeling that even though my family was around the corner, eating festively, no one would ever come for me. No one ever came for me. No one ever did and I don't know why? I barely understood why no one came in high-school but, this was supposed to be different, what happened to family? While they we're smiling, I was suffocating. It gave me an epiphany, that's actually what hurts the most, more then anything my cousin would ever say or do to me.
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---  A bird doesn't sing because it has all the answers, it sings because it has a song.
Maya Angelou.
so sing. Jazz, sing. --jazzy123456
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"You're not here merely to make a living. You are here to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, and with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world. You impoverish yourself if you forget this errand." (Woodrow Wilson)
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