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lynn09 · Nov 11, 2010, 07:11 PM

Awwww, Cherrios - I'm sorry you're feeling so low right now, but please don't be discouraged.

Clearly, it is not impossible for you to change. When you went from not working out to working out, you were successful at making that change. When you went from eating dairy and grains to not eating dairy and grains, again, you were successful at making that change. And you have very successful in changing how you were just after the accident to how you are now! How many times have you changed your hairstyle and hair-care products, clothing style, cosmetic products and techniques, etc., etc. Even though your present compulsions feel extremely strong, I'm sure if you stop to think about it you will realize that you have successfully made many, many changes throughout your life - replacing one habit or routine with another gradually over a period of time.

If you truly are OCD, you may not be able to change the fact that you are prone to being compulsive; however, with time and supportive behavioral modification therapy, you can gradually make small, incremental adjustments allowing yourself time to get comfortable with each little adjustment before making further adjustments.

Think of it as just "fine tuning" what you are already doing to optimize the effects on your body. For instance, over-exercising can actually reduce the benefits of working out because the muscles don't have time to heal and rebuild before being torn down again. Over the long-term, you would be doing more harm than good. Since most experts seem to agree that good aerobic and strengthening work outs for 30 minutes 3 times per week produce optimum benefits to the body, then working out more than that is an unnecessary investment of your time and energy and could actually do you more harm than good. Do some research to find out how much you actually need to exercise to maintain optimum health for your age and build.

As for the foods you do or do not eat, learn to look at food as nothing more than fuel because that is actually all it is. Just like certain high-performance engines need a specific mix of fuel to maintain optimum performance, the same is true of your body - after all, your body is just a biological machine and needs specific types and amounts of nutrients to maintain optimum performance at the cellular level. The goal is to create the best possible environment for your body so it can perform as it is designed to do. Just like you must provide a rosebush with the proper soil type, the right amount of water, sunlight, weed and pest control, and fertilizer (nutrients) for it to grow strong and healthy so it can produce beautiful blooms. Depriving it of any one thing that it needs is going to produce a sickly plant that cannot afford to spare its resources to produce beautiful blooms.

There is no one solution to most situations or problems, since most situations and problems are comprised of numerous variable factors; therefore, solutions must be multi-faceted conglomerates in order to address each of those variables. Breaking things down into smaller components makes it much easier to make adjustments in your perspective and lifestyle rather than trying to deal with everything at once. So, making a little tweak here and there makes change more manageable and less overwhelming - like putting together a jigsaw puzzle.

Getting a really definitive diagnosis of your condition(s) is crucial to your treatment and improvement. I would encourage you to consider obtaining a second opinion from a psychiatrist (MD) or a psychologist (PhD) - it can't do any harm, especially considering how you felt physically and emotionally after your T appointment.

Get some rest, give yourself some time to assimilate everything that has happened recently and everything you have learned, then take a look at things again in a few days. This will help you view everything from a more balanced and less-daunting perspective. Don't give up on yourself. Even though you didn't come away from your appointment with THE solution, you did come away with possibly one small piece of the puzzle - that's a start..

Keep posting so you can get the support you need while you go through this difficult process - you don't have to go it alone. lynn09