I know that it sounds strange, Sannah. My logical side says "NO, children don't allow the awful things to happen. We are/were victims." However, my strong emotional side does not buy the logical perspective. What I was trying to say is that I am still in that phase of blaming myself. It isn't fun to experience, but it also helps to accept these relentless emotions.

Does that make better sense? I'm definitely not trying to say that we should all blame ourselves for the abuse. I am trying to say that if we're still battling with those emotions, it's easier to accept the emotions for what they are (for the time being), and they will begin to pass. The more I dwell upon the emotions, the lower I feel. Accepting them (completely wrong, my rational side knows this) gives me a break from the misery.

Working through the experiences and negative thought patterns in therapy does help, but it takes time.