I am so blind sometime! I haven't seen this as manipulative but it is. I also haven't seen this as if he was abusing me mentally but he is. Blind, I'm so blind. So mixed up. This situation confused me so much.

Yes, I'm ashame to say that I am back with him. Yes, I am stupid. The most stupid person in this world.

I love my children so much. I couldn't bare see hurt in their eyes. Hurt that I have put there by leaving him.

This is the only place I talk about this. Nobody around me no nothing of my situation or the truth. I am a very private person and I don't show my pain.

Two of " my friend " even told me: "Wow you look great! You must have had a wonderful summer." This was said to me with a disgust in their voices and in their eyes. If only they has seen the marks that was on my body this summer they wouldn't say this to me.

I'm going to shut up now. I'm disgust with myself.

Thank you for your replies and your caring and your kindness. I am not worth any replies. Not worth at all.

I'm sorry to have bothered you. Do not mind me. It's just the same old story. Same stupid story from the same stupid person.

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