we have been doing counseling, if not aggressive. we are going to continue it through the divorce process to help us through with some semblance of a friendship/relationship intact.
yes most of my family has been/and will always continue to be emotionally unavailable. i am seeing my own t working on those issues.
the other guy did not become unavailable when i said i wanted to be with him, he is still not over his ex-love who recently got married and i said i would not be with him until he resolved those issues.
i think you are right that i will be happier and better able to figure out what i need from life on my own. i just find it hard to trust in myself. i have been battling depression both bc of my inner demons and those that have joined me from my soon-ex.