Hi Boulder! I am new here, but I am familiar with the feeling of anxiety and especially when you are dealing with issues of basic survival. I have myself been up/down and everywhere in between on the financial scale so I can surely relate. I would say that when I look back to the times of scarcity I always can be grateful for getting through and then I realize I ALWAYS MAKE IT. No matter how horrible a situation has been miraculously I have made it through. My point is that you will too! I agree with madisgram, HANG ON FOR DEAR LIFE, and we are here for you