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Whataguy7
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Member Since Oct 2010
Posts: 18
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Default Nov 13, 2010 at 01:54 PM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackCanary View Post
1) Are you about to have your FINAL session? If you are about to terminate therapy, then your feelings may also be related to a previous, difficult separation. You may still have some unresolved issues, but you will have to ask yourself some hard questions to figure it out.

2) It is a one-way love. I also liked my therapist (male) more than I expected. I am married, why would I fall in love with another man??
At the same time, I also knew nothing would ever come of it and I knew that if something DID come of it then it would be much, much worse. So, it was safe for me to have romantic feelings for him, no harm if he does not have feelings in return, right? It was still a big obsession, getting in my way.
The deep, emotional connection that you feel? I know that feeling. But, the therapist does not have this for us. The good, ethical therapist does not have emotional needs that are met in relationships with clients.

If your therapist is ethical, then she will graciously but firmly refuse your offer of friendship or romance. I warn you - It will feel horrible to you, like one of the worst rejections you have ever experienced. Even though I did not make this offer to my former therapist, I did confess my love. When he left for another job, I experienced very deep grief at the loss. I've been working with another therapist - a female this time - to unravel the feelings and the pain.

If she is not ethical, then you have a very serious problem!
Hi Black Canary

thank you for your insight. No it is not the last session to come up. I assume we will continue.
yes I ahad a loss in my life about two years ago but I do not relate that to this problem. YOu are probably right that I will be let down firmly. the thing is though I really feel there is some kinfd of connection here possibly on her part but she is very ethical. I mean com`mon, they have feeling s too. She always says that . that she is not a wind up robot. And she wants me to express my feelings. yes i wll surely grieve her loss if it happens that way. this is a tough one. I think everyone ( thereapists ) handles things differently towards everyone else
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