If you are trying to tell them verbally but get caught every time you try, don't think of the letter as "cheating" but rather as "getting the ball rolling".

You could tell them everything in the letter, or you could just give them the details and use that as a stepping point to filling them in more later, verbally. Maybe in the letter explain how this is hard to talk about, and the depression makes it hard to talk about.

Good luck worms. I think this is a good thing for you to be doing.